A Meteor Shower of What-Ifs

So Max Lucado lists several descriptions of anxiety:

• ·       a low-grade fear
• ·       an edginess
• ·       a free-floating sense of dread that hovers over you
• ·       a cold wind that won’t stop howling
• ·       not a storm but the certainty that one is coming
• ·       a meteor shower of what-ifs
• ·       part Chicken Little and part Eeyore – the sky is falling and it’s falling disproportionately on you
• ·       a caul across the heart
• ·       a nebulous hunch about things…that might happen…sometime in the future

Which of these ring true for you? Why?

For me, it depends on the situation. 

Some storms come strong and sudden. They make me feel helpless and scared of what would happen next. That’s when anxiety is a low-grade fear, an edginess.

Some not only strikes a little fear, but also pains because it may affect those I love. That’s when I feel the caul across my heart, squeezing it.

A meteor shower of what-ifs. My favorite. This line calls out to me. This is what anxiety is like for me most of the time. My mind just shoots all these scenarios and questions in rapid succession – what if this…what if that...? Or what about this? What about that? My mind is scrambling to find my own answers, my own solutions. In that moment, I’m so preoccupied with the meteors shooting across my mind that I fail to remember that God is the Creator and ultimately the one who has control of the situation.

What does anxiety do to you? What is it to you?

Anxiety is me desperately trying to grasp on to control. I am trying to fix it. I am going to find a way around it. I’m focused on taking charge of the situation, of gaining control. My anxiety level increases every time I realize or see that my way or my solution is not going to work. I sink deeper and deeper into desperation, getting more engulfed by anxiety.

This is not what God wants for me or anyone to experience. He wants us to let go. Let Him help. Let Him, the maker of Heaven and earth fix it. He doesn’t need a way around it. He is the way.

While anxiety does not grip me often - I usually meet most situations methodically and quite calmly, there are those one or two types of storms or tempests that I get caught up in. The meteor shower of what-ifs start to form as my need to take control sweeps over. They egg each other on. Soon enough, I feel like I’m drowning in anxiety.

Max Lucado's "Anxious for Nothing" has given me steps on how not to get caught up, how to relinquish control to the one who can fix all my problems and find solutions for all situations.

Job 5:19 (NIV) says: From six calamities He will rescue you, in seven no harm will touch you.

In any succession of troubles, however numerous, God will be able to deliver us.

Lord, continue to help me turn to you first when the storms of life hit me especially when multiple storms converge. But even before that, let me always start my day with rejoicing in you, remembering that you are sovereign and you will help me through it all. I just need to keep calm. No what-ifs, just certainty that I will prevail because I am in Your grip. 

Anxious for Nothing

I just finished an online Bible Study with Proverbs 31 Ministry, who is a blessing by the way. The study was based on Max Lucado's book "Anxious for Nothing". Amazing book. Amazing study. It has inspired me to go back and slowly dissect the chapters, sections and words. 

First thing I did was to go back to Chapter 1 and scribbled down all the key phrases that stood out to me. Then, I turned to the back of the book where Jessalyn Foggy had prepared some reflection questions. My plan is to review the chapters based on these reflection questions as well as the key phrases. And most important of all, listen to God speak to me.

After not posting anything for a long time on this journal - ashamed to say that I let life get too busy, I am going to try (I say try because I may get distracted again) to keep up with this journal. 

First things first, get immersed in Phil 4:4-9 (NIV)

4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God,which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.